Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Chapter 2.29- Slightly Over the Edge

          Laying across the bed next to Sally was something Layla had thought wouldn’t be happening ever again. The last time the two had been in a room sharing their thoughts and stories had been before that one date with Ned. It felt like a lifetime ago that the two had traveled to Lucky Palms to go shopping for a dress Sally thought would be appropriate for a date with the town’s (still) most eligible bachelor. They last she had heard, Ned still wasn’t seeing anyone.

          Shaking her head, Layla tried to focus on the here and now. Here in this room with her little cousin, now all grown up. Sally was a wife and a soon-to-be-mother, while Layla had gained a live-in boyfriend and his daughter. Times had changed, and changed them both as well.

          “Quit shaking the bed, please,” Sally said in a pitiful voice as Layla's head shaking sent reverberations across the mattress springs. Laying still for a second is wonderful. He (she indicated her belly) is never still and will not quit moving. And I’ve been everywhere today and I still feel like I’m moving. I just want to be still.”


          “Yeah, it’s a boy according to those grainy black and white pictures and the doctor. I guess we could go get one of those 4-d pics made where maybe I could be sure that’s really a twig and berries, but those kind of creep me out. Green is neutral and that’s what did the nursery in just in case.”

          “I take it you wanted a girl, then.”

          “Still want. Still hope, still cross my fingers for. I’m forever surrounded by men and boys anymore. I just want a little frilly, pink, baby doll to play with.”

          “Little bit hard on this kid already, aren’t ya?” Layla craned her neck to better look at Sally.

          “He’s hard on me. Fair’s fair.”

          “Oh, you’re really miserable aren’t you? Poor dear.”

          “You would be, too! I’m barely old enough to drink and I’m already married and pregnant and with Mom’s death I’m the one stepping into her shoes. I don’t know how to run a house nearly like she did! She just did it! Always! She didn’t think about it, she didn’t screw it up, she always had it all so perfect and neat and planned out and it was always just right! I can’t do that!”

          “Surely Uncle Trigger will help you out?”

          “Layla, Daddy went in his room the moment they took mom’s body away, and locked the door. We haven’t seen him since. We can hear him crying from inside, but he won’t come out.” Sally rolled onto her side. “It’s not like he even helped her run the house. He ran the farm, she ran the house. Now Ottawa is running the farm, and I’m running the house. That’s not how it should be.”

          “So how should it be?”

          “I dunno,” Sally said dreamily, looking out one of the windows. “It should be Ottawa and I locked in our room all day. And we wouldn’t be in there crying I’ll tell you that much.”

          Snorting a little bit, Layla flicked Sally’s thigh. “You know better than that. And by the look of your belly that is most likely what you and Ottawa did the second you both graduated. Am I right?”

          “Yes,” A mischievous grin spread across Sally’s face. “But it should have lasted for all eternity. Life wasn’t supposed to happen this soon. Literally! So I managed to catch you all dolled up and yet there’s no one else home it appears. Why aren’t you and Ignacio rolling around this bed ignoring life?”

          “Because life happened here too,” Layla sighed. “Maybe not quite in the same way as it did for you an Ottawa, but it happened.”

          Sally looked carefully at Layla, who was looking off into a corner sadly. In Sally’s guess there was trouble in paradise, but right now there were far more pressing things that had to be addressed.

          “Do you know that with Mom gone I can visit you now and it won’t hurt her?” Sally asked.

          “Won’t all the other gossips in town just shun you?”

          “Yes,” she said, matter-of-factly. “But I don’t care about them. And Ill still have friends who wont dare to say anything.”

          “What about your dad? Sally, your dad is home grieving pretty badly it sounds like. And I’m sure that he knew all about my ‘multiple transgressions against the moral health of the town’- or however they labeled my actions- and probably agreed with your mom. Shouldn’t his wishes still count for something?”

          Looking down at her swollen stomach which was jumping slightly Sally made a wry face at it. “Fine! Fine! I’ll roll over again, just be still for half a second. My kidneys are killing me.” Sally looked at Layla, who was looking off into a corner sadly, before rolling back onto her back. “He seems to think they’re soccer balls. And oh, PlumbBob, my back!”

          “Your dad, Sally,” Layla said. “Your dad is important to you. His opinion and mental health should be important to you. You could have called to tell me about Aunt Estella, and I’m glad you came over, don’t get me wrong. But your priority needs to be on making sure your dad is okay right now.”

          “Dad is still in shock,” Sally said wearily. “It just happened yesterday. So it’s only been a day. He’ll come out and get over it. He always bounces back fairly quickly when something happens. Like, he was so upset when Silas knocked up that Loveland chick and then told dad he had no plans for that to be long term and that he was just having fun. Wow. But just a few days later-”

          “-But this is a lot bigger than Silas and his attempts to sow wild oats-”

          “-Dad would never let Silas plant oats on the farm anyway. Says they’re too-”

          “-No, Sally,” Layla finally felt she’d found the teenager she remembered. But she was not pleased with what she’d uncovered. On the contrary, she was weary and annoyed. “I’m not talking about real oats. I’m saying that Silas is having his fun as a legal adult before he decides to settle down.”

          “Oh,” Sally said. “But Dad got over that anyway.”

          “Because it’s small fry in the grand scheme of things,” said Layla. “Your mother’s passing probably shook him to his very core. Didn’t they get married really young? Like you did? So having her suddenly taken from him was like somebody taking his security blanket and burning it in front of his eyes. And it’s your dad, Sally. You need to take care of him.”

          Sally sat up abruptly.

          “But I don’t want to take care of him,” She whined. “I want someone to take care of me.”

          “Sally,” Layla was truly reaching the end of her tether. With everything that had happened so far that day she wanted to rush outside and just scream in frustration she felt so overwhelmed. “Sally, when you decided to grow up, when you married Ottawa and got pregnant you forfeited that right. Being a grown up can be no fun when you’ve got those kinds of obligations. But you signed up for it.”

          “Is that why you’re still not married and have no kids? So you can play all the time?” Sally’s words were sharp, and though Layla was stung, she felt she deserved them.

          “I just-” Layla started, but she had to stop. Sally was right and wrong both and there was no way Layla could figure out how to tell her how it worked. She’d never understand. Shaking her head, she closed her mouth.

          “Do you even love Ignacio then? Or are you just playing around with him? Is that why you don’t go out into the town to try and show everyone that they’re wrong about you? Is that why you still hide? I came here hoping to find someone to talk to, who could understand, someone older and wiser and with experience. You want me to pull my dad out of his room and his grief? You want me to put on my big girl panties and be the strong woman my mother was? Do it to yourself.”

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          Seeing Sally flee past her windows Layla buried her head in her arms. How had she managed to make such a mess of that so quickly? Just today she’d managed to alienate both Ignacio and Sally. Single-handedly! Maybe she’d finally found her superpower. Lonergirl, with her ability to scare off even those who were supposed to like her. Well, Sally was supposed to like her. At this rate she really wasn’t sure where she stood with Ignacio. Or Sally. Stupid stupid stupid.

          Pressing her forehead into the bed she ran a hand along the back of her head. Grabbing a handful of her hair she pulled, gripping as tightly as she could. The sensation made her gasp a little and she pulled harder hoping the physical pain would numb the ache in her heart, the lump in her stomach.

          Hadn’t she told Sally that she was grieving the loss of her mother, too? Didn’t that count for something? She should have pointed out that she too had a father who had been devastated by a loss. Galen said Buck still acted a little lost most days. Both siblings doubted he’d ever move on from their mother.

          And who cared if she hadn’t ‘settled down’ yet? She still had plenty of childbearing years ahead of her! And it was her decision, her body. What if she went ahead and got pregnant but then discovered that it was the wrong decision? Phedra had done that. And Layla didn’t want to do the same. It wasn’t like she had a Cyrus to dump her kids on. Sabria didn’t mind helping with Tiburcia, but she'd made it clear that she wasn’t the girl’s parent and wouldn’t be the one raising her. So she’d probably say the same if Layla popped up pregnant. She’d help, but make it clear that Ignacio and Layla had a duty to perform.

          And so what if she and Ignacio weren’t married either? Things were comfortable just how they were. Until this morning. Blah. This morning...

          Layla flipped over, kicked something hard on Ignacio’s nightstand and scooted back, letting her head tip slightly over the edge of the bed. The back of her scalp tingled just a little as she put pressure on it and she kicked herself for doing something that stupid.

          Everything she’d done that day had been stupid. No. Not just done. Said. Everything she’d said. Everything she’d done. All of it.

          Hitting the top of her head with the end of her fist she sat up.

          She ought to get her tongue cut out. It’d make her life so much simpler. Going back as far as she could the first thing she never should have said was that she’d leave Ouroboros and Joel behind. Then, none of this mess would have ever happened. No Ignacio, No Sally, No Ned, No Tiburcia. Nothing would have been complicated. She would have lived, she would have loved and she would have been happy.

          But she did love. That was the problem. She loved Sally and Tiburcia and Aunt Estella she knew. Did she love Ignacio? It was hard to tell, especially right then which made her even more confused. Maybe she just needed to shut her feelings up in a little box and throw that key away. Then perhaps it would be easier to keep from saying stupid things. Or maybe she should go and find some island where it’s just her. Then she wouldn’t hurt anyone again.

          Sighing, Layla nearly reached for her phone, nearly called her mother. Mom’s gone Mom’s gone Mom’s gone Mom’s gone. Hoping the chant would get it into her brain. She just didn’t seem to be able to remember that her mother wouldn’t be on the other end. Wouldn’t pick up.

          How long was it supposed to take until she’d finally understand? How much older would she have to be to finally feel like a grown up? And how was it that she still hadn’t figured out her own life?

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          I warned you all that this generation would be fairly dark in the end, and we’ve got a ways to go. Still lots of surprises, still a lot to show. And even a few bright spots amidst all the mess. But the mess is kind of the point. 

          A final quick note here: Layla has been incredibly spoiled up until this point. She couldn't figure out what to do when she left school or where she'd go even, so her Father stepped in and did it for her. On her vacation between leaving home and arriving in Appaloosa Plains others took care of her when she ended up stranded alone on an island. When she arrived in Appaloosa Plains her Aunt, Cousin, and Ned kept her on track. And now? Well, now she's being guided by a sim with, at best, questionable motives.

          Anyhow, I'm back ladies and gents! Home again and more than ready to get down to business with the some of the finer points coming up. So keep an eye out because there are big things afoot with the Sixkillers! Though the pool is going up today to so it'll still be slower than it will be during the school year. Yay for swimming in your own backyard with speakers and umbrellas and chairs and all the room you want and the music you want and the happy you want. Yay!

          Finally, because it seems I'm a Chatty Cathy today (Ha!), there are a few outtakes from this chapter up under the bloopers and outtakes tab.

          Thank you to all my readers who stuck around waiting for an update while I was running around the majority of the Southern US on vacation!!! You're all so awesome!


  1. It's nice that Layla and Sally can be friends openly again. It's sad, though, that it took Estella's death to make this possible. Silly Sally, the honeymoon doesn't last for all eternity! It's good that, even though she's only barely an adult, her and Ottawa have stepped up to take care of the house and land, I just hope Sally doesn't end up bitter about it.

    LOL @ Sally's misinterpretation of the sowing oats comment! Who woulda thunk it would be Layla giving advice on responsibility. Sally's parting comments were interesting though, and may get Layla thinking about her own priorities again.

    Oh Layla. Life on Ouroboros may be simple, but life carries responsibilities there as well.

    Yay for getting the pool opened!!

    1. Yes on the pool! It's got about a foot of water in it and the kids are already in having a blast. Ha! It's exciting.

      Sally stepped up even if she didn't want to which is nice, but I don't think she'll end up bitter. I really think she was just venting for the most part. Sally is ready to step up and make changes, like she said she wanted to renew her relationship with Layla. Sally is just a little nervous and scared more than anything. And then Layla: She's keeping herself afloat, but she's not really acting as responsibly as she should. Might be time for her to take some of her own advice.

  2. "How long was it supposed to take until she’d finally understand? How much older would she have to be to finally feel like a grown up? And how was it that she still hadn’t figured out her own life?" - Oh, hello mindreader...
    Yeah, as a 22 year old, living with my boyfriend (minus the kid), in a dead-end job with no idea what she wants to do with her life, except that maybe someday she might have kids... Yeah, i get exactly what Layla is thinking!

    Anyway, great to see Sally again, but a shame that she and Layla aren't as good a friends as they once were. Hopefully when they're both over the loss of their mothers, and Layla is over her fear of babies, they can meet up like old times and just talk and have fun.

    Layla is still going on about *bleeping* Ouroboros!! (Sorry, Misty)
    I mean, yeah, she had a great time there, and it was like her coming of age, but she lives so far in the past sometimes that it's almost unbelieveable that she managed to get a boyfriend and have him move in! Seriously, though, she needs to start thinking of the future rather than the past. Forget about Ouroboros and Joel (he's over you!), forget about "What if I'd stayed?" and start thinking "How about I...?" Start doing, start living. Come on, Layla! You only have a short lifespan as a sim, and we all know you need at least one baby! Get to it! :p

    Shuttup about your pool and your nice predictable summers and your holidays. *sighs*
    Good to have to back, though!

    1. Aw! I think we all feel that way at some point. And you never fell like a grown up. I swear I'm still 11 most days and yet that was 20 years ago and I'd give anything to go back to being a stupid kid and have all the freedom I took for granted.

      Yeah. I think they're both grieving and while they'd both like things to just go back to how they were they've both changed. They'll definitely have to take some time to get to know each other again.

      I think she's almost at the point where I she'll be forced to look around her and see that the past is over and gone. I just hope it's not too late when she finally does that.

      I love my pool though! And we waited so long to get it up just for vacation that I have to brag! Swimming is such a wonderful way to cool off! And I'd give anything for some of your rain right about now! So send that my way and I'll send you some more heat!

      It's good to be back! It's been too long! ;)

  3. Sally is whiny and spoiled but Layla is so much more so. It's almost amusing to see her trying to give advice when she should really be listening more herself. I agree with gemly; Layla needs to stop living in the past. What's done is done and all she can do is move forward. That doesn't mean she has to have a baby right away just because she's old enough but she needs to start living with some responsibility and making decisions and taking action all for herself.

    Also, yay for a pool! It sounds absolutely lovely!

    1. Yup. She absolutely does need to start living in the now and boy oh boy! Does she ever need to listen to herself! lol She will though. It's what we're working towards (slowly I know, but it is coming!) She has a real tendency to look back only to see where other people took care of her. She doesn't look at the trouble others took to do just that. And that's another problem. She doesn't really get that sometimes a little pain can be a lot of pleasure.

      It is! We've been working on the backyard to make it a real haven for summer for a few months now and getting to enjoy the fruits of our labor is wonderful! Now I'm just missing a margarita or a daiquiri!

  4. Awww, Layla. She seems really naive at times, and she definitely is spoiled. As a woman who "should" have a kid by now, at least according to my family, I sympathize with her to some degree. Still, both her and Sally need to grow up.

    It's sad that Estella had to die in order for Sally to be able to talk to Layla again, but I'm glad that it happened (hee, that sounds heartless).

    Also, a pool?? I'm jealous. :C

    1. Lol. Layla is incredibly naïve most of the time. Ha! It's actually caused quite a few problems writing her sometimes too because I don't get some of the things she does but she's incredibly strong. Growing up might be just the thing she needs. However, she's going to have to get a good strong kick in order to get her to look at her life in a way that might be considered responsible. Actually, it's going to take a lot more than a good strong kick. Ha!

      Yeah it's horrid, and I loved the outs Estella gave me to try and attempt to get Layla to listen, but I'm kind of glad she's gone too so I can have Sally back. I love Sally more. Ha! It's not heartless. It's very reasonable. However, the street for Layla's (beg pardon as I'm using the term very loosely on purpose) 'shunning' goes both ways. If she'd not hidden herself, or approached her Aunt, she might not have had to wait for such a dramatic even to happen to get her little friend back.

      Come join us! The stone hasn't all set on the walkways around it, but we're rockin' out in the backyard as it fills and the stone sets. Just bring a towel and your bathing suit! We're always up for folks to join us!

  5. Yay---I'm officially caught up(since someone snuck another chapter in here today, lol Not that I'm complaining, mind you!)!!

    I had to laugh at Layla giving advice, it is always easy to see what other people need to do! It seems like Layla is on the edge of a breakthrough though----come on Layla---you can do it! You can figure things out, and finally leave the Past in the past. What ifs are life killers, and even if she had managed to stay on the Island with Joel, things would not have been easy peasy as she seems to think. We bring our problems with us, wherever we may be, lol :P

    1. lol! Congrats on getting here!

      Giving advice is so easy to do! Listening and taking it are another matter. And doesn't always seem like the one giving the advice is the one who needs to take it most?
      She will get there and she is close to a break through. Losing the support you thought you had can often make you look around at what's going on and she's about to get some wake up calls that might just make her take stock as well as decide what to jettison and what to keep.

  6. I laughed at Layla's advice to Sally, because she has never acted like a grown up herself.

    I pretty much agree with everything Gemma said, Layla lives in some fantasy vacation la-la land in her head. It's time for her to look around, accept where she is now and decide where she wants to be tomorrow, and start working toward it.

    1. Yup! She really ought to listen to herself shouldn't she?

      She does need to do that, it's past time. But she's also got to be ready to accept what she sees when she does finally open her eyes. That time is coming though.

  7. I agree with everyone about Layla's advice to Sally, she desperately needs to listen to herself! She also needs to look forward rather than back and start thinking about other people rather than drifting through life all the time. Hopefully her talk with Sally will start pushing her towards thinking that way.

    1. I think she's going to start thinking a little more forward in the very near future. But she's got to want to look forward too, and I'm afraid that may be something that is forced on her.

  8. Hello,

    Just started reading your legacy today, and even though I have some catching up to do and don't know everything that is happening I still enjoyed this chapter. I could empathize with Layla and Sally! Great update!

    1. Thanks! Welcome to the home of the Sixkillers! I hope you enjoy the story.

      I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for commenting!

  9. Blind leading the blind in this chapter.
    Ya know, I once thought I had my feelings locked up in a box and thrown into the deepest part of the ocean (that's off the west coast of South America, right?). Thing is, the box was metal and stayed attached to me by a chain. What does metal do in water? It rusts. The box didn't stay down, and the chain was retractable or whatever you call it. It came back to me with no warning and wouldn't let itself be put into another box. So, I had to look it in the face. I looked at it for a long time. "Yep, you're there," I said. It took a while before I could say, "But you don't run my life." Obligations run our lives because we set them up that way, choose them. Whether or not she wants to admit it, Layla is choosing to hurt people. She brings them in and then hurts them when they try to get too close. Self-defense mechanism? Quite possibly. A lot of crap people do is in some form of self-defense. "Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you" kind of thing. :)

    Well, from what you've said, Layla doesn't get her act together any time soon. But.... Who wants to read about someone perfect? Hehe

    1. That it is! Layla's is total self defense. And all because she allowed the thought that Galen or Arden could tell her what to do. Oh, absolutely. She's going to have to actually face everything at some point and deal with it. And hopefully sooner rather than... oh wait. We're already 30 chapters into this generation. lol. *sigh. Ah well. At some point. :)

      Perfection is boooooring. Beautiful, but boring. lol. And to paraphrase a zen believe: Perfection is unknowable, especially in legacies!

  10. Things are getting messier and messier! It feels kind of mean, but I'm so curious to see how much more there is in store for Layla...

    1. If you don't tie up all those loose ends, tangles are sure to happen!